Monday 29th September 2008 (pp3950-61)

It makes me very happy to see this much writing. And all black too. I have ben struggling in recent days to write in such a sustained and concentrated manner. I long for such creative fulfilment. 

Sunday 28th September 2008 (pp4932-9)

There is a purging of red writing build-up, like first thing in the morning when you can't function creatively and then boom black writing with a proper title to the section and everything. Picking up the black pen was often quite a monumental effort. There is a reference at the beginning of the black writing to a song by The Microphones.

Saturday 27th September 2008 (no pages written)

The ceiling in our flat slanted so that when you were doing the washing up your head pretty much rested against it. The bathroom had a skylight high up that got mouldy and then all the insides of the cupboards got mouldy as well. There was a little window alcove that you had to squeeze yourself into if you wanted to use it; we had a record player in there for a while. You could see out to sea from one window and then the downs from others. 

Friday 26th September 2008 (no pages written)

1996: 'Got my first Warhammer model, a Chaos Space marine + gun. Went round B.Ks & played on the SNES and Warhammer.'

2008: Unknown

2013: Got up at half 8. Took a pill. Had breakfast whilst listening to 6music and updating this blog. Went to work.

Thursday 25th September 2008 (pp3938-41)

One day I will look back on these posts as I look back now on my diary entries of 1996. I will think how young I was then, how naive and I will grieve the wasted potential. Or maybe not. But is there always wasted potential? Imagine living life to its maximum efficiency, so that you ensure no second is ever wasted.

Wednesday 24th September 2008 (pp3930-7)

Looks like I attempted fiction today but decided to swap to the blue pen of non-fiction, though reading it over I'm not sure how non-fiction it is.

Tuesday 23rd September 2008 (pp3922-9)

Here we see the red pensive words of plot construction. Somewhere around here there is a sex scene (the red writing might be the planning of said scene). In the previous entry 'sex' is written at the top of one of the pages. The island man finds a girl even though he is on a remote island and they have sex. I once gave James this part of the story to read after I had typed it all up and he wrote messages of encouragement in the margins. I wrote it like I wasn't going to give any details but then I did.

Monday 22nd September 2008 (pp3912-21)

I used to enjoy self-pity. I used to enjoy making it into this tragic writing like I was Byron or something. My girlfriend at the time hated this tendency and used to admonish me for it and I would think, 'how can you be so mean, I love everything about you, good or bad?' But in hindsight it was good for me to have someone rub salt in my weak parts and point them out because it meant I could IMPROVE myself which is always necessary.